... Prince Charming?

I'm here to address something that I see as a big issue in our society.  I know others struggle with it because I definitely do.  I would even dare to say that it's the #1 concern on most girls' hearts.

Waiting on The One

You know, Prince Charming.  He'll come sweeping in on a horse, decked out with muscles and gorgeous hair.  He's kind, caring, sensitive without being too much, handsome, adorable, and of course, a gentleman.

As a girl that completely bought into this, I'm struggling at 18.

With every boy lost, I get more and more exhausted/frustrated/aggravated/bitter/mad with/at God.  My Prince Charming should be here any minute.  He should come waltzing in and swoon me and we'll get married and have kids and things will be perfect.

I'm not sure where the disconnect happened, but somewhere along the lines, our society amped up this boy into something that he isn't.  Supposedly, he'll make our lives complete.  Supposedly, he'll be all we need.  Supposedly, supposedly, supposedly..

I'm not sure about anyone else, but I'm about dang tired of "supposedly".  I'm tired of getting my hopes up only to be let down.  I'm tired of being rejected.  And quite frankly, I'm tired of not feeling good enough.

In the Christian world, it's become assumed that if you haven't met Mr. Right yet, you have to focus on your relationship with Christ first/more.  If Mr. Right isn't in the picture, obviously you're doing something wrong.  I wouldn't say that that is totally wrong, but I can't agree with it either.
This way of thinking is too much for any teenage girl to handle.  You're not doing good enough for God.  Once you fix yourself, He'll give you what you want.

I wouldn't venture to say that every girl feels that way, but I would say some do because I do.  This phenomenon makes it seem like we have to do more to please God to get blessings from Him.  That is so twisted.

Don't you know that it was finished on the cross?
Don't you know that God adores you and wants to bless you, even when you do Him wrong?
Don't you know that you will never be good enough for God, but that He pursues you and loves you anyway?

It's a dangerous place to be when we feel like we're waiting on God.  This leads to this built up anger inside because God isn't giving us what we want and we begin to feel like we'll never get it because we'll never be good enough.

What if God's #1 for me isn't right on paper?  What if he has different wants than I do?  
If you're following me at all, I think you know where I'm going with this.  You see, we've created this jacked up image of what "God's Best" + Prince Charming should be like.  But the two are not at all the same.  Prince Charming is what the world wants for you, while God's Best is THE best.

I say it all the time, but it gets harder and harder everyday to be a Christian.  I think that's all part of the plan, no doubt.  But this is such a dangerous place to be.  Stumbling between Prince Charming and God's Best is no fun.

Ladies, God has a plan for you FAR beyond anything you could ever imagine (HALLELUJAH FOR THAT).  God is working, even in your trials.  In every season, He is weaving.  He never quits, ever.  He is the only Man that will never fail you.

I don't think that you have to be good enough to get blessings from God.  I believe that God works out all things in HIS timing, for HIS purposes, for HIS will to be done, so that HE may be brought the ultimate glory.

So, if you're a Lady in Waiting like I am, keep waiting.  Wait until God interrupts your waiting.  Heaven has a plan (and a man ;) HEY) for you.  

Romans 8:28- And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.

Prayer Time: God, I pray that you would give the women of our society strength.  I pray for strength to stand against society and to wait for what is right.  God, I pray that you would encourage us in our faith, so that you may be brought the ultimate glory in all situations.  I pray for a peace in your presence and a hope in your name.  We know that you are working for us and I pray that we would never forget that truth, but rather we would cling to it.  We love you, God, and we give you all the praise.  In Your Son's name, amen.

It Never Runs Out On Me

I HATE that it has been so long since I've been here.  To say things have been crazy is an understatement. But what's new? That's my life.

I'm learning day by day that the farther away from God I get, the harder the devil attacks against me.  One little slip up and Satan comes in the destroy everything.  And he makes it seem as if I can never get back to God.  This is kind of where I am now.  Hopelessly, helplessly, desperately clinging to whatever God-resembling thing I can. 

If you've never heard Your Love Never Fails by Jesus Culture, I recommend you listen.  It seems to slap me back into reality.  Because as soon as I feel like I've run too far, God calls me Home.  As soon as I feel like I have messed up way too much, God calls me back.  As soon as I get wrapped up in my sin and there is literally no way out on my own, God comes to my rescue.  

When it feels like God's love has run out on me, He speaks the loudest to reassure me that He isn't done with me.

I don't know how God does it.  I couldn't walk even a moment in His shoes, that's for sure.  I guess that's the reason that I keep expecting God to run out on me.  I'm waiting for the day when He looks at me and says "Brenna, it's been enough.  You're helpless.  And I'm done trying."  

Now, while I hope (and know) that day will never come, my human mind (and sinful heart and soul) waits for it.  Even with words like Proverbs 3:5-6 that says "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight", I fear that God cannot possibly put up with me forever.

I tell you what.  Thank God for His grace.  Thank God for His love.  Thank God for His compassion.  Thank God for His faithfulness.  Because I am so, so, so undeserving.  

Though I haven't figured it out again, I'm going to fix this.  God is still there, thank Goodness.  And He's waiting, though I've been running.

Prayer Time: Thank you, God, for all that you are.  Thank you for never, ever, ever even considering giving up on me.  Thank you for a love that never fails, never gives up,  and never runs out on me.  Thank you for chasing me when I chase the world.  In Jesus' name I pray, amen.

Romans 8:37-39- No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor the present nor the future, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Sorry for such a short post.  Thanks for reading and putting up with me.  God is good.

Forgotten God

I, as an girl, a teenager, an American, a loving heart, a future mom, a future wife, a big sister, a little sister, a Vacation Bible School teacher, a Christian Ministries major, a Christian, and a human, would be foolish to believe that I could ignore the recent events that have shaken our nation.

I'm not politically sound enough, educated on gun control enough, or even very intelligent enough, so you could surely read more posts that are much more encouraging and well-written than mine about the Sandy Hook Shooting on Friday.  But as I live through (above all others, a Christian) and get ready to live through (still, above all others, a Christian) all the things listed above, I find it harder and harder to ignore the shooting.

Everyone knows what happened.  For far too many people, worlds stopped spinning on Friday.  Glasses of optimism were turned upside down, water pouring out until absolutely nothing was left.  Parents, siblings, teachers, principals, public safety, Christians, non-Christians, everyone is left wondering how and why.

The question is asked over and over and I'd be lying if I said that I had an answer right away: "Where is God?"  

"Where is your God" would probably be more accurate of a question for a large percentage of modern-day America.  Being a Christian does not make this question that much easier to answer for me, if I can be real about it.  I would be lying if I said I didn't ask myself the same question.  That probably makes me look really bad as a Christian and I'm sorry about that.

I think that a lot of Christians (ME, ME, ME) today struggle with accepting God in some ways and rejected Him in others.  Like seeking God when we have a hard test coming up, but not seeking Him when it comes to a future spouse.  Trusting God with fixing our future, but living sinful, unjustified, "I-wouldn't-even-get-close-to-that-mess" lives now.  Praising God when times are good, but bashing God when things get rough.  

It seems that a lot of Christians (STILL ME) have bailed on God in the recent days.  Forgetting the character of God, we've resorted to trying to figure out the whys.  

Forget that God is faithful.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God is sovereign.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God is just.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God will forever reign.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God is the Alpha and the Omega.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God commands all things.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God is the only Healer.  Why did this happen, God?

Forget that God loves us.  Why did this happen, God?

If God is good all the time, why did this happen?  If God is for His people, why did this happen?

It's important for us to realize that God has a plan for all things, even the bad things.  He is working, even in this.  He is good, even in this.  He is here in the valley.  He is loving even when He is hard to find.  He is hope when there is no hope.

A little off topic, but seriously, I would be a wreck if I wasn't a Christian.  There would be no hope for tomorrow.  No light at the end of the tunnel.  I remember living that way and thinking that way.  Hallelujah for my Savior.  Hallelujah that He pulled me out of that.  

Anyway, we have to remember that God has a plan.  I've heard Steven Curtis Chapman describe it this way-

When we look at a picture and we're standing really close to it, it's so hard to understand what it is.  We can only focus on certain parts, only the parts we see.  But when we can step back and look at the bigger picture, it will all begin to make sense.

Here on earth, days later, it's beyond difficult to understand the murder of 26 people, 20 of those children ages 6-7.  We can't make sense of it.  And I may sound psycho and screwed up for even saying this, but I honestly believe that one day on Heaven's side of things, we'll all be able to understand.  The picture will make sense when we see the whole thing.  On this side of eternity, it's unfathomable ever being able to get it.  But if there's anything I know, it's that we worship the King of kings and I know that He has a plan.  In the pit, He has a plan and He is still working.  I've seen it with my own life.  Our God is good.  Our God is hope.

You Will Reign by Kristian Stanfill

Whom Shall I Fear by Chris Tomlin

Prayer Time:  God, I pray for the families directly affected by this horrible incident.  I pray that you surround them with hope, love, adoration, comfort, and a peace that only you could ever supply.  I pray for the sin of our nation, God.  I pray that Christians around the world would take this as the best time ever to rise up and shine for You.  I pray that you give us strength, endurance, and encouragement to stand for Your name.  I pray for the leaders of our country, God, that they would lead and seek wisdom for the future of our nation.  We may not understand all they do, but we know that you have put them in line and that there is a reason for you putting them in the leadership positions that they are in.  Thank you for your love and grace.  Thank you for your sin because in Him and only Him are our sins paid.  Thank you for loving us when we are so unlovable.  I pray that we take nothing for granted and live precious lives in light of you.  Thank you for all that you're doing, God, even here.  Thank you for the firm hope we have in you and your name.  Thank you for the promise of a better day.  It's in your son's name that I pray, amen.

Romans 8:28- "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose."

Romans 8:31-39- "What then shall we say to these things?  If God is for us, who can be against us?  He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for all of us, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?  Who shall bring any charge against God's elect?  It is God who justifies.  Who is to condemn?  Christ Jesus is the one who died--more than that, who was raised-- who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us.  Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?  Shall tribulation, or distress  or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?  As it is written, 'For your sake we are being killed all the day long; we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.'  No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.  For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

By the way, "more than conquerors" is my next tattoo.

By by the way, because of recent events, I've decided that after majoring in Christian Ministries  I'll be going into Children's Ministry.  I love the babies and I cannot, cannot, CANNOT wait to help them.

By by by the way, I love you guys that read this and put up with my rambling.  I'm praying for you guys, even those of you I don't know by name.  Y'all give me strength and bless me more than I can explain.  

By by by by the way, sorry for the confused rambling, I couldn't formulate this into a very well-written post.

By by by by by the way, <3.

Yours is the victory.  All glory, honor, power is Yours, amen.